How To Make Friends And Escape Hermitville

How To Get A Life
(No Really!)

Were you born Miss Congeniality and can easily make new friends?  Then, good for you!  But for some, this may be a difficult, anxiety provoking task.  Reason being, they are too shy to talk to new faces, unsure of how and when to approach another person, or just lacking confidence to make new friends.  But whatever the case may be, worry no more because we have provided some great tips to put yourself out there, escape Hermitville, and enjoy your new found freedom and friends!

Here are some simple steps on how to make friends:

1. Go out and mingle.

If you really want to make new friends, try going places where you can meet all different types of people, such as a coffee shop, yoga or cake decorating class.  Sometimes it’s easier to put yourself out there in smaller more intimate environments rather than going to parties or bars.  Strike up a conversation with the barista about your favorite cup of joe or someone in your yoga class about how to improve your inner yogi moves!  Get out there and mingle!

2. Join in with others who share common interests.

Whether you join a group or form a group, it doesn’t matter, both are ok.  When you are part of a group of people who share a common interest, you instantly have something to talk about and bond over.  A pottery class, craft demonstration, sports, whatever it may be can lay the foundation for a great friendship.  Sign up for a class at your local recreation center, fitness club, or craft store and let your strength and creativity shine, and meet some new people along the way!

3. Don’t speak ill about other people.

Who wants to be friends with a backstabber?  No one, right?  Unless, you want to be friends with a backstabber too.  Always speak kindly of others.  Studies show that because of the psychological phenomenon of spontaneous trait transference, people unintentionally transfer to you the traits you ascribe to other people.  So if you speak ill about other people, someone might be speaking ill about you too.  When you speak highly of others, people will recognize.  You will be seen as a more positive person and attract that positivity back to you!

4. Have a happy disposition.

Having a happy disposition, smiling and enjoying others company can have a direct effect on how friendly you’re perceived to be.  When you smile and are genuinely happy, it makes other people think that you are approachable and fun to be with.  You will naturally draw people towards you!

5. Be sensitive about your topics.

When having a conversation with someone you just met, it is important to be aware of sensitive topics such as religion and politics and try to keep the conversation light and airy.  If you’re complaining about something, make sure it’s something you’re both dissatisfied with and talk about something that will not result in arguments or debates.  It’s ok to ask about something more personal to make the other person feel that you’re really interested in making friends with him or her, but be gentle and careful.

6. Greet people.

Like smiling, greeting people is a great way to make new friends, by showing other people that you are approachable and easy to be around.  A simple “hello” can go a long way.

7. Be a good listener.

If you are in a big crowd or just a small circle, active listening is your best weapon in making new friends. Listen carefully to what people say and remember important details about them.  Active listening is a great way to get to know somebody on a deeper level, because it allows you to ask the right questions, and find common interests that can really take your friendship to the next level.  Instead of an acquaintance, a true friendship can form!

8. Don’t try to rush your interactions with people.

Be patient in making new friends.  If you see someone who has a potential to be your friend and you can share common interests with, gather your thoughts about the topics you want to talk about.  Being too aggressive won’t get you more friends; instead, you’ll just come across as pushy and scare them away.

9. Be confident.

Always bear in your mind that people will like you for you.  Like the quote says, “What you see is what you get”.  Having confidence allows others to know that you are proud of who you are and what makes you, you.  So many people lack confidence and are instantly attracted to people who have confidence for the simple fact that they want more of what that girl has.  If you are in a group, make the effort and start talking no matter how uncomfortable it feels.

10. Be open to new possibilities.

Be open-minded with everyone you meet.   Those who think, feel and act differently from you are usually the ones you can learn the most from.  You never know what might be in store for you!

So go on and put yourself out there!   You never know who you may be inspiring today!

Hope this Helps…

Yours for More Confidence, More Often

Kristyn Haster