Are You Locked into the Jealousy Trap?
It’s natural to want things that other people have and I don’t mean tangible items, like a flashy sports cars. Other people’s life accomplishments can ignite a desire to attain more, like seeing someone with a successful career, outwardly loving relationship, or a fit body. Sometimes, noticing these achievements in others can be helpful in creating personalized goals when you are starting with your life renovation. But, when the green-eyed monster becomes a constant part of your personality, it’s time to consider: am I locked into the jealousy trap? The jealousy trap can harm your present state of mind and derail your future goal realizations in many ways, such as:
- Decrease your self-confidence
- Damage your belief in the power of change
- Increase your resistance to stepping outside of your comfort zone
- Strip you of the perseverance you need to attain your long-term goals
- Promote a sense of inner-turmoil, which can have both psychological and physiological effects
Here are 3 Questions to Free Yourself from the Jealousy Trap:
1. Am I happy for my loved one’s successes? It’s easy enough to say that stranger over there must have worked hard to accomplish a goal. Yet, it can be difficult to say the same when those closest to you change their life for the better. Your loved ones’ achievements make it real that you haven’t yet started on or reached your own life goals. If you feel yourself particularly troubled by the successes of family and friends, force yourself to say out loud why you are proud of that person and understand that if she/he can do it, so can you.
2. Do I frequently compare my life to other’s lives? Comparison is a magic mirror that can show you who want to become, while also showing you who you haven’t become. Embrace your desire to achieve a goal each time you find yourself comparing your life to another’s life. Then, write out concrete, detailed plans on how you can work every day to make it happen, but do not distract yourself with negative self-talk.
3. How much do I love myself? If you degrade who you are and cannot see your present magnificence, you will not move past a place of jealousy. The fact remains that everyone’s life path is different. You will not take the same route to accomplishing your goals as anyone else. Your journey, the way you begin and your final cross over the finish-line will be unique to you, but you have to love who you are now to get there.
Working on your inner-self is essential if you expect to change anything about your life. First, you have to fix “you,” then you can upgrade the outside. I am here to give you the tools you need to move forward and rid yourself of the stagnation and procrastination that comes from negativity. Let’s go on this journey together!
Yours for more confidence, more often,
About the Author
Kristyn Haster is a Lifestyle Blogger, Weight Loss Trainer and Self-Confidence Coach living in Boulder, Colorado. As Editor of LiveLethal.com (Crazy Confident You) Blog, she helps woman break out of their shells, gain total confidence and fall in love with life again.